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i don't know where to put this but figured this site and board is relatively low traffic enough to feel okay posting it here. i was cyberstalked by some random asshole that started recognizing me on an imageboard and i no longer trust the internet as a "safe place" to do stupid shit. once your privacy has been invaded, you start self censoring yourself, and i feel a sense of loss over forums that i used to like and regularly use that i now no longer can post on without getting sent weird creepy messages.

i stg, i'm not schizo. it would be hard to explain how exactly it happened but, i basically had my internet traffic monitored (i had no basic cybersecurity knowledge so it would have been easier to do so when things happened), so i would start getting weird messages on forums i used. again, i know that sounds schizo, but it was very specific things that hinted that they recognized me and hacked into my personal accounts whenever i would post, like extremely specific references to messages i sent to my parents, whenever i posted a photo of myself on certain sites, comments on my appearance or the context of posts i would make, things like that.

the point is, i feel like my sense of privacy has been completely shattered. when that happens, you start... editing yourself online. anonymity used to be fun and an outlet for self expression, now i just feel paranoid that some asshole will get pissed off at the things i say and take things way too far.

i feel like this is how people chip away at your spirit. when you feel that you are being monitored, the natural effect of self censorship happens, even if it feels like... i am not even sure how to word it, but like you have to suppress the things that make you human.

i realize true anonymity may be impossible to achieve on the internet. you will always have some digital identity being logged and secured in databases you have no control over. but i moreso just feel angry that someone wanted to make me feel unsafe in the first place and took away that feeling of being anonymous from me, even if it was never true in the first place.

anonymity and privacy is so important. there are so many weird people who want to take it away from you, i don't even really know why, but i hope anyone who reads this can maybe be a bit more informed. there are really fucking weird people in the world and on the internet who will just do shit like this. so please use vpns, two factor authentification, and other basic cybersecurity methods to avoid having this happen to you.

also, it just fucking sucks. i hate feeling paranoid. i hate that i know longer can use some digital spaces that felt "safe" or whatever bullshit. i hate that people push you to self censor yourself. there's nothing i can do about it but i just wish we never had to worry about these types of people in the first place, or that i was smarter with my online footprint. it just sucks. i really dont fucking know how else to put it.